Update: Amy’s Life

Currently looking for an internship and if anyone has any bright ideas let me know! I would really appreciate it. My friend had an interview for an internship with the Today Show but didn’t go to the interview. How dare he! How could he miss such a grand opportunity! I would kill just to get Al Roker’s coffee in the morning!

Also work is killing me slowly. 6 days a week, with school and homework, and no life- something’s gotta give and my grades are slowly struggling to stay straight A’s like they usually are.

I hope to make it past this semester so in the fall I can hopefully manage things better than I have. I mean I’ve done well so far but I need more sleep and so my grades are slowly starting to suffer.

The weather is also really nice and I can’t wait until school is out so I can spend my days at the sand bar and my nights at BK.

Another new thing is that I have a boyfriend.

And for the first few days (first week, honestly) I didn’t really feel like a girlfriend, not that I know exactly how a girlfriend should feel, and I was panicking because well.. I’m so young,and this is new, and I’m not ready for anything serious – because it seems to me that I’ve only ever really committed to myself, BK, and my friends and family…

But I like this boy.. and when you like a boy being their girlfriend is like the ultimate privilege?

So within the past week I have come to realize that my communication skills are not exactly above anyone else’s when it comes to relationships – I think.

This past week I was really afraid of the whole idea of being exclusive, I knew I wanted to be with this boy but I didn’t know if I wanted to be exclusive because that would mean no more other boys and what if I didn’t want that? Heaven knows I like options.

But thankfully, this boy and I can talk about everything and I’m not afraid to tell him my concerns. He probably thinks I’m nuts, but he’s also really patient.

Which is a plus for me.

After we talked for what felt like forever, I felt better, I mean I felt vulnerable because he knows all my concerns and where these concerns derived from. but somehow for whatever reason he still wants me around.

“Why’d you pick me over all the other girls you know?”
“Because I like listening to you more than the others.”

The epitome of simple. And I like it.

My Halloween Week was very Halloween-ie

October is over and Halloween week is coming to an end…

And what do I have to show for it? Well let me tell you..

Last Friday:
Went to a par-tay, and got down.. at a “haunted” middle school… a little more raunchy than haunted..
I was Pocahontas, met Brooks from the Bachlorette and ladies he is as hot as he is on television.  Oh! &I kissed him on the cheek.. and he told me I was cute! ‘eeeeeeek!

Last Saturday:
I went to the Haunted Mill with a boy, and that was a really really really fun time. Kinda like that song… BTW I’m the biggest weenie, I’m such a ‘fraidy cat.

Monday:
Worst day ever. I was tired. I was grumpy. I was exhausted. And so were my roommates. We had a yelling match on campus and in front of everyone. Then died on the side walk. Then almost got hit by Shane’s car for laying on the side walk… shit my pants.. jk – no I’m not.. haha and then went to the store bought groceries.. but then it rained, and it rained hard, and most people say that you should dance in the rain.. or the joy that comes from getting caught in the rain.. FYI those are all lies when you live on the third floor and have 5928759826 bags of food. But then we carved pumpkins and that was fun. Mine.. didn’t turn out too bad, ha it wasn’t the best.. but it wasn’t awful ha

Tuesday: Nothing to report. Just another typical Tuesday I guess.

Wednesday:
Was just another hump day, I did a ton of homework that day. Actually this whole week it feels like I hardly left my living room couch because I had so much homework. But I did go on a date Wednesday night, ha I had a lot of fun, it was a good time and I’d do it again with the same guy ha and that’s all I have to say about that.

Thursday: HALLOWEEN!
I skipped class to write two of my papers that were due this morning. I managed to write both in five hours, I don’t know if that’s such a good pace but I’m definitely hoping to get an A on both. Haha now I didn’t skip class solely to get ahead in my academics.. I wanted to finish my homework so I could stay out all night and party, which is what we did. I was a hippie, flower child, whatever… I really loved wearing the flower headband  you know the beat? 😉 haha

So we went to this thing called the Uprising, and it was pretty fun. At first we were like “No one’s here!” but then everyone and their dog showed up. We got low. My roommates joke I’m the best dancer, and uh let’s be real.. they ain’t jokin’ 😉 haha we danced all night and there was a mosh pit and that was a bit cray-cray I got pushed, my hair pulled, feet stepped on, lost my friend’s bracelet -_- but thankfully ha at least I didn’t fall over.

Oh! And they had a platform for V.I.P’s and I wasn’t a V.I.P by any means but I got up there for awhile and that was really fun everyone cheering! ..and then my 40 seconds of fame was over because I got asked to get down because I wasn’t a V.I.P ;(

Ha but yah so that was fun, glad I didn’t stay home for Halloween… Got home late and then tried to watch a movie but ended up heading to bed because I was so T I R E D

And now today is, Friday:

Woke up at 9:52 this morning and I have class at 10:15 and I usually leave by 9:50 because class is on the other side of campus! But thankfully I got a ride, I also look like I got kicked in the face because I’m so tired haha (it’s not that bad but it feels like I’ve been kicked in the face)

So I got a ride, like I was saying, got to class right on time… which my professor didn’t even show but I turned in my paper.. bought a grilled cheese sandwich for lunch, almost fell asleep but managed to sit up long enough to tell you all about my week..

Life lessons for this week:
1.) Mondays are sometimes the worst day of the week, and if you get caught in the rain with your 58769275 bags of groceries and live on the top floor… just remember… “You CAN make it in one trip.”

2.) Skipping class is only okay if it will serve a better cause. I.E. so you can party later that night

3.) If you wake up late for class, lets hope you have a friend with a car. And if you don’t well… just go back to bed… unless you have a paper due in which case you’d better run.

4.) If you have a good first date, give yourself a pat on the back because that hardly ever happens.

5.) Dressing up for Halloween is fun and you should probably do it.

That’s all I got.. woo-hoo

xoxo

Little Love

I forgot to mention that yesterday was my parents’ anniversary. 21 years together. How’d they do it? How’re they doing it? Must really take quite a bit outta you. How does anyone do it?

Man wasn’t meant to be alone, I know that… But developing a relationship that can last forever truly is of a divine nature… It takes a bit of work.. 

And hey remember when I said I was afraid of commitment? I’m not going to say I’m not afraid anymore but ha I know I don’t want to be alone forever… and that I probably should be more open to.. well I don’t know.. more open to things happening ha

My roommates tease me that I’m in love with that army boy I talked about forever ago, and shamelessly still talk about like it’s going outta style. But I don’t know what love is, so could be true? Ha hope not, what would I do about that if it were? Nothing. 

But I’m still dating… Mother would be proud to know that I’m not in my apartment every night blogging… haha lucky for her I do that in the morning 😉

Also tonight we’re going to a few Halloween parties! AW YEEEE” I think/ really want to be Pocahontas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is that too much to ask?

Oh and I lost two pounds this week! How. Exciting. Is. THAT? Pretty freakin’ exciting. 

Okay I’ve gotten off point here… 

Point is my parents found love, love each other and I want that too. I’m not in love with the army boy, but I am in love with the fact that I lost two pounds this week. 

That is all.

 

So he isn’t calling…

Today is Wednesday. Wednesday is hump day, and two days away from Friday. I have oodles of homework to do… I have other blogs to critique.. I have two miles to run.. and all I’m thinking about are boys. 

In my interpersonal communications class we’ve been talking about self-concept. We’ve been discussing how we let others’ perception of who we are impact who we actually are. We all would probably agree that we only allow certain peoples’ opinions and expectations to impact how we view ourselves. 

But what I was thinking is.. ladies.. why do we allow some semi-attractive boy we just met effect the way we see ourselves? 

I.E. when a boy we like, or think we like, if he doesn’t tell you you’re pretty then we naturally assume that perhaps he just doesn’t think we are. Which may or may not be the case but then I guess I should just say some of us think that well maybe we aren’t. Or what if after a first date he doesn’t call you and so … sometimes I assume he just thinks I’m fat, or ugly, or just not cute. 

Maybe these things aren’t related… ha I was just talking to my seeshta and so we ended up talking about it because she may or may not be feeling this way, hating herself because it didn’t work out with some Joe from the block that she just met.

I don’t know about you but I told her that we don’t have the time to be concerned with whether or not a boy is half in love with you after the first date. And there definitely isn’t enough time to spend hating yourself because you think you’re too fat, weren’t funny enough, or you should’ve worn different shoes. 

Even if you had the best first date ever.. sometimes they just don’t call! Sometimes they just don’t fall in love with you! 

And it isn’t because you weren’t good enough.. It’s the same reason you don’t swoon for the guy that’s chasing you.. he just isn’t what you’re looking for.

There’s nothing wrong with that!

There’s nothing wrong with a boy or a few boys passing you by without the slightest bit of interest, it doesn’t make you less valuable or less beautiful or less funny or less smart. It just means that you weren’t what he was looking for and baby girl there’s enough time for you to find what it is you’re looking for which is most important.

I’m only 20 years old I don’t have time to hate myself for everything I’m not but I do have time to perfect who I can become. And if a boy isn’t interested because I’m not his perfect woman than that’s fine because he probably isn’t my perfect man.

So to the boy that made my sister feel like she wasn’t good enough… Thank you. You weren’t good enough either.

And that’s how I feel about that..